I created this site in memory of my daughter
Eva , who died on the 09.10.01 of anencephaly.
This defect is diagnosted in 1 of 1000 pregnancies. If you ever faced this grief in your life, feel free to contact me - we can help each other
My name is Larissa I'm trying to gather all the available information of anencephaly on this site in memory of all our born angels
I love you Eva, my sweetheart :
...My not born girlie...
Eva is my second daughter.
We have been living together with my b/f for half a year, loved each other a lot and decided to become Mom and Dad again.
Anencephaly
is a neural tube defect that causes the brain and skull to stop developing, very early, in fetal development. Anencephaly has no treatment, or cure, and is always fatal. Roughly 1 in every 1,000 pregnancies is affected by this or another neural tube defect, such as Spina Bifida. Children, if alive, are deaf, blind, do not feel anything and suffer many seizures. They rarely live over a few hours/days/weeks.My elder daughter Julia of 9 was delighted to learn of a coming infant - she wanted a little sister, we agreed to call her Eva. Julia used to take me to the kid's shops pretty often looking for prams, clothes and other nice stuff for Eva. In Russia we normally do not buy anything until the baby is born - so we were just looking and talking of Eva.
Knowing all that some of the mothers, decide to carry on and get the baby. Others interrupt pregnancy
I had a very strange forefeeling - i did not believe i was pregnant. It was a perfect pregnancy - i felt very well, didn't have even a slightest discomfort. And only when i was 20 weeks the belly started growing. Even after i had seen her on the screen of the ultra sound machine i could not believe i was going to be a Mom again.
The first ultrasound was made on the 16th week and despite i went into a modern private clinic the doctor turned out to be an imbicile. The head of the baby was too low to be seen and he said it's ok, no need to check.
That's why for another ultrasound i went to another clinic but I was 23 weeks already. The woman greeted us, had a look and asked to send my husband away. It was silly coz he didn't speak russian that well but I did. The doctor said that that pregnancy is obviously lost coz the baby had no brain. I was too shocked to understand what it means "no brain" - idiot? invalid? She explained all about the anencephaly. She was professional enuff to send me to the best professor in Moscow, whose confirmation of brain defects is final. He confirmed it the day after and said that nobody knew the reasons of the anen and IT NEVER HAPPENED TWICE TO THE SAME WOMAN.
My hubby and me were too shocked to think of the both variants-to interupt or to carry on. Plus I was allowed only ceasaerian due to a problem which has noffing to do with the pregnancy but prohibited the labor itself. Only after the hospital i learned of the women who carried on with an anencephalic baby. I respect them to no end and envy a lot. I didn't even asked for the body of my Eva. I wish I did. I blame myself a lot. If i could start from the very beginning i would have carried on and have had a better memorial for my little angel in the real world.
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